Portabella

Regular  - By Chris

My ears perked up when I'd heard the words "Nouvelle Cuisine" and I envisaged having to mortgage the flat or sell a kidney at the very least but when I found myself with the menu, it was quite surprised. It's laid out rather well but the place is small and one would uncharitably say that it's large enough only for a studio apartment.

Upon being asked for the drinks menu we were told that due to the lack of a bar license the only libations served were some Indian wine and the they'd "obtain" beer for us but I didn't want them to do anything illegal so it was Eau de Cauvery for us.

The names were rather delightful but the same can not be said of the food which was rather average. The starters were alright but the snapper was a mistake, and knowing a thing or two about fish by virtue of being a Keralite, it was, ahem ahem chewy. Not quite an adjective one would attribute to fish but that's what it was, and tasteless. Since I was quite enthralled by my dining companion I forgot to ask if it was frozen. Mea culpa.

The dessert was humdrum and they didn't have the Tiramisu so a rather industrial Blueberry cheesecake and Lime Pie was chosen. The decor was muted but they play infernal jazz which sit didn't sit well with a metal fan and it was asked to be lowered.

It appears that a decent quantum of thought was given to the place but a rather disproportionately less amount on the food. It wasn't dazzling, the taste didn't register and the texture was all wrong. I was prepared for a memorable dining experience but the food didn't quite provide it. It's not a place to be avoided just do not expect anything great. Service was commendable and it may have to do with the fact that the place was more than half empty so any diners would look like a godsend.

Compared to the other dining establishments and the Shylockian prices they charge one can expect to part with 1400 rupees for a meal for two and not expect to go home and eat again.

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